As I venture into the beginning stages of being an entrepreneur and all the things that go along with that, I have been able to observe several ways that I hold myself back from people. In the past few years I have been shown by the Lord a ton of walls that I have built in the name of self protection. Someone hurt me so I built a wall or fortified a wall that was previously built in an attempt to avoid a similar situation. I have worked hard with God to tear those walls down. Allowing all kinds of emotional pain and vulnerability into my life because those walls were actually hurting me more than helping. They were hurting the people around me too. God is the only one fit to protect our hearts. He does it like any good parent should. He knows His children and He allows pain in order to teach lessons that stick. When I was a kid, I was clumsy and fell a lot. I often had scabs on my knees. I learned (rather slowly) that if you aren’t careful, you will fall and get hurt. That is a valuable lesson that I may not have learned well had I not experienced it first hand. Based on that pain, I learned what things are worth trying or not. Is it worth the possibility of skinned knee?
I have been contemplating social media and the image put forward by so many as being perfect. Having all the answers and having the perfect kids. Trust me, my kids are perfect, but it isn’t because I ironed their clothes or put bows in their hair. They are perfect because they are people just like you and me who make mistakes and have hopes and dreams. I adore my children and I know they are fallible like me. Therefore I make boundaries for them so they can grow up in a safe protected environment while also being allowed to adventure and be wild.
The big thought came up while I was trying to put together a video for my Facebook group. I replayed the video and I looked rigid and unwelcoming. I realized it was because I was trying to cover up my biggest insecurity. There are parts of me that I have not made complete peace with. For instance, I have very crooked teeth and I have convinced myself that people will look the other way because of my lack of perfection, but in reality, it is our unique imperfections that help us remain humble and touchable. I want you to see the real me so I resolve to show you me. I am a very passionate person with things to say and hopefully I have an entertaining quality.
What about you? What are things that you hide in an attempt to protect yourself from criticism? If you really think about it, do you think maybe you are just withholding part of your unique personality or look? I challenge you to let yourself go. If you are too insecure to do it in public, do what I did. Break out your cell phone camera or computer and record yourself. First as you would like to present yourself then do a second video after you allow yourself to be the vulnerable you that you don’t let people see. Tell me what happens!